I'll be your clown.......

Hi, 

Okay, I've always loved music, since I was a kid,listening to radio 2 with my mum on the school run for my brother, then playing the piano at school and becoming better every lesson at adapting the music so I can play with one hand and right now, listening to music while I am writing-there's just something captivating about it for me, as if I'm in my own little world with music. I feel that music can explain so much about different peoples lives and who they are. It's so special in that sense- like a conversation between  me and the artist which is unique to everyone. 

There is one song that for me sums up how I feel having a physical disability; it's a song that has no intention to be connected to disability,but it has a deep meaning for me and it's called clown by Emeli Sandé. 

 I'm going to give you my interpretation of the song:

 

I guess it's funnier from where you're standing (as in its = cerebral palsy)

Cause from over here I missed the joke (as in CP isn't funny)

Clear the way for my crash landing (you making a joke out of it knocks me back a bit)

I've done it again (I've lashed out about it before)

Another number for your notes ( number = a blog post)

I'd be smiling if I wasn't so desperate (I don't want my disability)

I'd be patient if I had the time (I want to be 'normal')

I could stop and answer all of your questions (I want people to learn about disability)

As soon as I find out 

How I can move from the back of the line (back of the line = not getting recognised for my academic side because of CP and people assuming that I am dumb)

[Chorus:]

I'll be your clown (I guess I'm labelled a 'freak' in some's eyes)

Behind the glass (being put into boxes/labelled)

Go 'head and laugh

Cause it's funny ( you laugh because you don't understand)

I would too if I saw me (I would laugh if I didn't understand)

I'll be your clown (I believe them in when they think I'm a freak)

On your favourite channel

My life's a circus circus

Round in circles (I believe them then I don't and so on...)

I'm selling out tonight

I'd be less angry if it was my decision ( decision = if I could choose to have a disability)

And the money was just rolling in

If I had more than my ambition (if I have more confidence and strength)

I'll have time for 'Please'

I'll have time for 'Thank you' (sorry that I seem ungrateful about my disability)

As soon as I win

[Chorus]

From a distance my choice is simple 

From a distance I can entertain (if you don't really know me I am an outsider and you laugh)

So you can see me

I put make-up on my face (I am not as strong and independent as you think I am)

But there's no way you can feel it

From so far away (you have absolutely no idea how it feels for me)

[Chorus]

I know it is deep but it's how I feel and music can provoke feelings that I didn't even know I had let alone anyone else, the point of this is I feel that music is a really useful tool to help explain how you feel if it's hard to explain or you don't want to even. I guess you find out a lot about people when you put yourself in their shoes and listen to music they like- it brings a whole new meaning to it. 

 

*I have just realised that I've probably broken a copyright law or something, but I would count this as an educational purpose,wouldn't you? Anyways

Hopefully This could help people express how they feel 

Byeeeeeeeeee